|Published March 29, 2007.|
|The Bicycle Thief|
|Dear sir or madam who stole my bike in front of the Quinpool Rd. Superstore,|
I don't know anything about you, but let me tell you about myself...
I am poor...really poor and that bike was the best thing that I have ever had and I used it daily. Right now my life is going down the crapper pretty quickly and you have successfully made it 100% worse. I will never be able to afford another bike. Oh! one last tidbit about me...I have a serious rage problem (probably directly related to getting fucked so many times) and if I ever see you out on my bike, my problem will most definately become yours.