|Published May 04, 2006.|
|Welcome to any movie theatre in the city!|
|Come in and enjoy our high back seats that haven't been properly cleaned since they were installed! If you like expensive popcorn, feel free to spend your week's salary on the best stale popcorn the city has to offer!|
Our teenaged, sometimes stoned staff with no proper technically training will gladly project your favorite movie for you. But please understand it's ONLY a movie so if anything goes wrong during the show there's no need to complain because who cares!
Our state of the art theatres in downtown are best suited for the deaf or hearing impared as we never bother to check any equipment before we screen a film.
So the next time you want to see a lackluster american film that's been playing for 4 weeks, please feel free to drop by!
P.S.- If your asian, please purcahse at least 5 tickets per show because we know how you asians like to theatre hop- and don't worry, we'll check your ticket even if we know you paid for the screening. Unlike those honest white folk who would never ever theatre hop- we never need to ask to se their ticket- they have Jesus on their side. Silly Buddha, will you ever learn?
|—Movie Theatre Quality|