a) only a Haligonian could be so thick as to ask such a dumbass question (hint: it's a camera).
b) getting the Cover Shot for my Ugliest Girls of Halifax calendar.
c) do you own Victoria Park? No? OK, fuck off then.
d) like my wise old granny used to say, if you ain't got nothin' nice to say, go fuck yourself.
e) all of the above and this: get over your humourless self.