Dear Hardware Store:

Why do you hire that hapless dude to harrass me for my personal information? I know it's for some "contest" which I don't care about, but come on. It's like talking to a telemarketer face to face. The guy has a script, which you can tell he probably recites in his sleep. His eyes are dead. The last time he approached me I said I was in a hurry, which I was, so couldn't talk to him. The response? Dead eyed stare. Fuck the hell off and get a real job. And hardware store, please hire someone who doesn't look like he cries himself to sleep at night.

---Just want mah paint rollers...

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