So why is it whenever I feel like things are going pretty damn well in my life, someone or something has to pop up to remind me how much better my ex is doing?

Am I petty for caring? Probably. But there's nothing wrong with wanting to feel smug and awesome in the face of an almost universally (or at least regionally) recognized douche bag, who could stand to be kicked down from his self-propped pedestal, even if temporarily.

I hate it though. It diminishes the value of the what is going great in my life and makes me feel ungrateful. So goddammit people, help me out, and don't tell me about his gorgeous new girl or bad ass job or incredible travels. Really. At least allow me the illusion of superiority.—Bitter, better, cookie batter