My Mother Hates Me...She's Probably Right To Do So

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My mother hates me...and can I blame her? I probably hate myself just as much or more than she does. She's threatening to kick me out for the second time now...or actually I think she may have told me I better be getting out soon. You have no idea how sad I am that I injured myself and was unable to work for a month and help pay for the bills...you have no idea how frustrated I am with EI that it takes FOREVER to ever see money from them, which at this point I'm starting to doubt whether I ever will, but it made me really sad that you assumed I wasn't going to call my job to see if I could come back now...I told you I had to wait for that stupid trailer to be gone. I know how much of a failure I am to you, I know how much of a failure I am to myself. You remind me how stupid and how much I disappoint you all the time. I have no idea where I will go if you kick me out, probably the streets, I rather that then go back to those horrid homeless shelters I've stayed at before. I wish I would've known I was about to be homeless before I put a deposit down on a 1500$ dog, that I have no idea how I'm going to take care of now. I'm trying to figure out ways I can come up with the rent money fast so you wont feel like you have to kick me out or cancel our trip, so I'm looking into stripping and checking out sugar daddy dating sites cause I have no idea what else I'm suppose to do here, how else I'm suppose to just come up with all of this money. I really am sorry mom that I'm not a better person, a less lazy person, a less insignificant, stupid, disappointing person. I'm really and truly sorry I have failed in everyway imaginable. —Sad and Alone Forever

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