Listen Up

I know you want to be my friend and I wanted to be your friend, but I can't deal with you. Instead of just running away, I'm going to tell you why I can't deal with spending time with you: you don't listen. I mean, really listen. When I talk, you nod your head and smile and when I'm done talking, without any acknowledgement or reflection about what I shared with you and without any sign you were remotely interested in what I said, you tell me about something you thought of while I was talking. That is not listening. That is what I heard so beautifully described once as "competitive talking". Then, every few minutes you put the competitive talking on hold so you can look something up on your smart phone about a subject I did not express interest in and couldn't care less about and then you tell me about it. You seem like a nice person. But when I spend time with you I end up feeling frustrated, ignored and steamrolled. Maybe you just lack empathy. I don't know if it's something you can change or even want to change, but I thought you should know. —Game Over


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