Nova Scotia: Die Miserable

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I'm trying to wrap my head around what it is in Halifax's culture, and Nova Scotia in general, that is so negative and pronounced... I mean, the proof's in the pudding and I've never seen so many downtrodden, moody and just plain miserable fuckers in all my life. I often wonder if there's some Be-An-Asshole-Chemical in the air being steadily pumped into the unsuspecting sleepwalking culture OR some invisible smog of negativity and depression that constantly hangs over everything and slowly drains peoples life-force AFTER making them slowly lose their minds...
Well, I've observed that generations of men were basically unemployed deadbeats, prompting resentment from women, who, in turn, eventually snowballed an immense FemiNazi culture of staggering and horrifying proportions( I've never seen so many half-shaved heads eating salads behind so many pairs of Buddy Holly glasses-this is madness!). The men, excluded from the Lesbianic activities, eventually also turned to their fellows, wore tight jeans, grew monstrous beards and, like the ladies, decided 'Well, since I have no 'real' work ethic in me, I'll just opt for artsy pop-culture and pretend I'm somehow useful to the world: "Yeah, that's it! We'll hide in shabby drug-inspired pop-art and even worse music! Hotdiggity! Great Scott, I've done it!"
And the poor? I mean, the shelter-doomed, smoke-grubbing hopeless poor? Don't even get me started. Since moving here, I've lost all feeling for the poor and regard them with utter contempt( What's all the more fucked up? IM POOR TOO!). The rich here are just plain lucky and are limited to rare sightings like UFO's...
So * sighs* Yeah, this place is fucked in more ways than one... I can see why people just up and leave. I'm presently trapped here but am planning my escape. I'll be the proverbial bearer of grim tidings like in every adventure story: the decrepit lonely soul who says "Don't go back that way Mister! That place is doomed! Many go that way and some...*points a trembling finger*...never return.."
Someone get me the fuck out of here! —Hiding my smokes and beating these bastards off with a stick!

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