Where nothing was found

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What did it feel like, I cannot recall. But I remember it was good. It was untamed and dirty, spurring me into moments where my inhibitions squandered. A whore so penetrated by desire, sucking lust which fuelled a spirit unmatched before. That was what you did. But I emotionally sat alone, away and far apart from every moment I wanted to be around him, around her and them. You didn’t know I held a taste and smelled like them all, gallivanting down the streets as if I owned them. As if I deserved their pleasure smeared across my mouth, between my thighs and in my hair. Their shame was on display and they didn’t know. You thought I was just giving myself to you this whole time? Did you think i was just for you? As you whispered sweet nothings in my ear? How very foolish of you. I was never yours, you never mine and you can’t hurt me anymore because I’m gone. I hear nothing but the voice of my own now, reflecting on your inebriated self during nights filled with broken promises and booze. You were entertaining until you weren’t anymore. We’re all too fucking good. —A.C.U.

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