Girlfriend, you seriously need to pressure wash your area. It smells as if someone left an open bottle of porter and a half-eaten donair on the sidewalk for a week. In August.
That may pass muster when welcoming the vernal equinox, but since it is, as you are so fond of saying "Getting, rather than giving is a feminist issue," you need to meet the rest of the world half way.
—Yes, that's Tiger Balm I'm putting on my upper lip.