Bearded Guy

First of all, I'm a happily married woman with no intentions of connecting romantically with said bearded guy. I just needed it to be known in the least awkward way, that this man has the most BEAUTIFUL beard I have ever seen. We both go to the same school on the Dartmouth Waterfront. I see you frequently, mostly on the bus, but last week I saw you while grocery shopping with my husband. We passed each other in the canned soup aisle, I got really excited and turned around to my husband to exclaim "THAT'S HIM!". Before I even got the words out, my husband looks at me with a stunned face and says, "that man had the most beautiful beard". You must know it, ladies and men must ask to touch it. It blends so well with your perfectly coiffed hair; thick and well groomed, I wouldn't be surprised if you were a beard model. To steal a quote from Jemaine Clement of FOTC because he said it best, "your beard is good". — Beard lover

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