This comic book adaptation plays like a trip inside the subconscious of a 12-year-old boy, a place where random shit explodes and Megan Fox’s cleavage glistens permanently. But to the post-pubescent, this tale of a scar-faced bounty hunter tracking down the man who murdered his family---and who plans to unleash a weapon of mass destruction on the post-Civil War US---doesn’t offer much. Josh Brolin scowls and growls admirably as Hex, but Fox doesn’t register as anything more than eye candy and John Malkovich, who can play evil villains in his sleep, seems to have taken that challenge a bit too literally. With its uninspired acting, Swiss-cheese plot and incoherent action sequences, Jonah Hex is a load of nonsense. And not the fun kind.