At home: The best way to improve the taste of a cheap beer is to mix it with a quality beer. Take Fruli, the Belgian strawberry beer, and put a shot in a king can of Alpine Max. It becomes alcopop. Likewise, add strong ginger beer or a dash of lime cordial into some Wildcat, now that's a taste of summer. The greatest take on the shandy is our Neon Cowboy: Get a forty of Colt 45 and a jug of lemon-lime Gatorade. Synthesize these two caricatures of beer and juice together. Squirt a hefty shot of Gator in a glass and top off with malty liquor. Cowboy, I wish I knew how to quit you. Snakebite: the UK drink favoured by teens who drink in parks because this cocktail's banned from British bars now. We're going to nice this up for home use. Fill half a glass with Propeller Pilsner and mix it with Tideview local cider, now sold in individual-sized bottles.
Play FAXE hands: Take one punk rocker. Duct tape one can of strong FAXE 10% beer firmly into each hand. Tape them mitts solid. Make the punk drink 'em and don't let those hands free until each can is finished. This is a foul experience. FAXE tastes worse as it gets warm, so there is a time consideration to this drink bomb.
Go out: Stout and cider can be a great combo. The Foggy Goggle (1667 Argyle) calls theirs a Tiara. The Goggle layers Guinness over Du Minot cider on tap. Du Minot is a great dry cider made in Quebec and distributed by McAuslan. The apple flavour grows as you work through the glass. The Black and Tan is another layered drink using two heavy beers. It looks like a bruise and tastes even better. Try this one at the Henry House (1222 Barrington), where they mix Keefe's Stout with their Best Bitter. Durty Nelly's does it 100 percent Irish with Guinness and Harp lager. Go for a Black Velvet---stout and champagne was Cary Grant's drink of choice, you stylish tippler---at Fizz Champagne Bar (1566 Argyle) where they mix Guinness and Jacob's Creek sparkling wine.
Catch up: If you had to work late, or have supper with your parents before, then you go out to join your friends, you need an equalizer. Go to Mosaic (1584 Argyle). Ask Cooper Tardivel for an Atomic Bomb: A 14oz glass with half a Corona, an ounce of Jaegermeister and an ounce of citrus vodka, topped up with Red Bull. Skull it down in one go. Tardivel says that works every time.
Sunday: The Bloodshot Eye is our brunch version of the classic Red Eye to get you out of the fetal postion. This involves ice, Garrison Jalapeno Ale, Clamato and celery salt around the edge of the glass. The silkiness comes from the Clamato. Add more spice with some Tabasco or Worcestershire Sauce. (The usual raw egg is optional.) It's a commitment to another day of drinking. Oh, and to add to the heat, try some popcorn pepperoni, inspired by a treat at Moncton's Pumphouse Brewpub. Breaded, deep-fried Brother's pepperoni. That's a hangover cure.