- Source: The Onion
It's Brad Janovich day! A huge game for the team, the US play England this afternoon at 3:30pm. According to the Guardian, the Americans are lacking in any Michael Jordan players (no stars), so they'll have to play well as a team. But of course Janovich knows this—while his buddies are eating peanuts and cracker jacks, he'll be annoying at the pub:
As the 2010 World Cup approaches, friends, family, and coworkers of 32-year-old Brad Janovich are growing less tolerant of the exuberant behavior of the United States' lone soccer fan.
"Who's got World Cup fever?" Janovich asked his officemates at Credit Solutions Friday, failing to notice their silent stares as he reported for work clad in the sole Team USA jersey sold this year. "I do! I've got World Cup fever!"
"Check out this World Cup wall chart I just bought," added Janovich, who is the only American citizen currently aware that the World Cup begins June 11.
Read the rest of The Onion's sadly bang-on parody piece.